profile

Grit, Gratitude & Grace

The gratitude practice that worked when "be grateful" felt insultingadcast

Published 6 months ago • 1 min read

Grit, Gratitude, & Grace Newsletter

Reader

Here's 1 insight, 2 quotes, and 1 challenge to consider this week...

1 Insight From Me

When my wife was diagnosed with cancer and I lost my job in 2024, people kept telling me: "Just be grateful. It could be worse."

I wanted to scream. Grateful? FOR cancer? FOR unemployment? FOR the worst season of our lives?

You don't have to be grateful FOR your circumstances. You can be grateful IN your circumstances.

I wasn't grateful FOR cancer. But IN the cancer journey, I was grateful for:

  • Florena's strength through every treatment
  • The friend who showed up with groceries unannounced
  • The medical team that treated her with dignity
  • The moments of laughter even on hard days
  • The chance to show up for her when it mattered most

I wasn't grateful FOR job loss. But IN unemployment, I was grateful for:

  • Time to be present during Florena's appointments
  • The skills I was developing through hardship
  • The people who believed in me when I didn't
  • The chance to rebuild my career with intention

This Mother's Day weekend, as we honor mothers and caregivers, this distinction matters. Gratitude isn't toxic positivity that ignores pain. It's the practice of noticing what's still good while acknowledging what's hard.

Gratitude doesn't deny reality. It finds light within it.

2 Quotes

I.

"Gratitude is an affirmation of goodness. We affirm that there are good things in the world, gifts and benefits we've received. This doesn't mean life is perfect—it means we choose to see the good that exists." - Robert Emmons

II.

"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." - 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV)

1 Challenge

The "Grateful IN" Practice

This week, write down one hard thing you're facing right now.

Then complete this sentence 5 times:

"I'm not grateful FOR [hard thing], but IN this experience, I'm grateful for..."

Examples:

  • "I'm not grateful for this diagnosis, but in this experience, I'm grateful for the people who've shown up."
  • "I'm not grateful for this financial stress, but in this situation, I'm grateful for learning what truly matters."
  • "I'm not grateful for this loss, but in this grief, I'm grateful for the love that made the loss hurt this much."

This isn't toxic positivity. It's honest gratitude that holds both the pain and the good.

Remember: Feed your mind. Fuel your actions. Find your fire. 🔥

Want more frameworks like this? My book Mindset Metamorphosis includes the complete gratitude practice system for maintaining mental health during adversity.

DK Kang

Author | Wellness Advocate | Plant-Based Athlete | LMT

dk@dkkang.com

www.dkkang.com​

600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
​Unsubscribe · Preferences​

Grit, Gratitude & Grace

By DK Kang - Author

I help everyday people facing life's unexpected challenges—job loss, health scares, financial stress—learn how to build unshakeable resilience with my weekly newsletter that combines real stories from walking through cancer, debt, and setbacks with practical strategies from 34 years of martial arts training. Each Sunday, you'll get authentic wisdom tested in life's toughest battles, not theory from someone who's never been knocked down. Sign up and get a free download of Chapter 1 from my book "Mindset Metamorphosis" to start transforming your setbacks into comebacks through grit, gratitude, and grace.

Read more from Grit, Gratitude & Grace

Grit, Gratitude, & Grace Newsletter Reader 1 Insight From Me October 2024. Looking back at the year, people kept saying: "You handled this with such grace." The word "grace" made me uncomfortable because it suggested some kind of spiritual or emotional advantage I had. But I didn't have grace naturally. I practiced it. What people saw as grace was actually discipline. Early in the crisis, I made a framework for gratitude. It wasn't "think positive thoughts" or "find the silver lining." Those...

14 days ago • 2 min read

Grit, Gratitude, & Grace Newsletter Reader 1 Insight From Me Late October 2024. People kept asking: "Are you recovering?" And I'd say: "From what?" Not because the year didn't hurt. It did. Florena's cancer treatment was brutal. Job loss was disorienting. Financial stress was real. But recovery implies going back to where you were. And I'm not going back. The question isn't: How do I recover from 2024? The question is: How do I build on 2024? Because 2024 wasn't a detour from my real life. It...

just now • 2 min read

Grit, Gratitude, & Grace Newsletter Reader 1 Insight From Me Late October 2024. The year that started with "we might not survive this" is ending with "we designed our lives intentionally." I took time to review the year systematically. Not with rose-tinted glasses, but with honest data. What I found when I looked back: The crisis didn't create who I became. It revealed who I could become if I chose to. Every framework in these newsletters—systems, delegation, consistency, energy management,...

just now • 2 min read